Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Dear Sir/Madam/furry,

It has come to my attention lately that you appear to be having problems. Firstly I would like to point out very clearly that not only do I have the solution to these woes I’m going to tell you whether you like it or not…

1) Insist that everyone pays lots and lots of tax.

2) Scale back on all non-profit making enterprises, you know stuff like making the thing run smoothly, I for one miss the regular grid downtime, wasnt it once a week for hours at a time? top fun was to be had by all, simply repeatedly trying to log in to annoy you.

3) Make things really hard to use and force a new viewer on everyone that you have to retrain your brain simply to IM someone.

4) Ban flying and teleporting, this is a personal fave of mine, imagine the fun to be had having to wait for a train that would take several hours to reach the Velvet (other indie clubs are available, some are good Laundromat, some are not so nice ALT7) This step would also stop random weirdos landing whenever they liked and also in one swoop stop idiots from going somewhere just to be annoying, you know who you are.

5) Reinstall SL’s amazing Jed Brimm is drunk mode, I miss my badly spelled messages of love ❤

6) And finally cancel the planned name change feature, this promises to be the new gesturing. $1ls prize to the first person that renames themselves after another avatar only altering it slightly, example ssmarinerspeenistiny Flossberg.

so there you have it, I have solved all your problems. Your are very welcome and no thanks are needed (though if you insist I am prepared to accept tokens of love shaped like linden dollars)

Yours respectfully

ssmarinerspeenistiny Flossberg.

Advertisements

Once upon a time, well, a few days ago, I logged into SL to a random location provided by my Emerald viewer. It was deserted and pretty and looked like a peaceful place to park Jed while I read some emails and went about my morning routine, which I confess is nowhere near as exciting or glamorous as that of my dear friend Flossy’s. Occasionally I would have a look at my viewer in the vain hope that someone may have said hello to me. Imagine my surprise when between sips of coffee I look up and see what I first thought was an angel…

Snapshot_001

I dare you to tell me that wasn’t destiny. I know there are cynics among you who will scoff, but although no words were spoken, I  believe something magical happened that morning. That we shared a moment. But as cruel fate would have it, she was gone before I could muster the courage to speak to her.

I’ve logged in to that location  every morning since. I’m quite willing to stand there for however long it takes to see her again. But I was thinking… if anyone would know a girl like that, it would the good readers and authors on this blog. Perhaps she is even one of your alts. Lux’s maybe? SS? Anyone know this girl? Please help me.

Signed,

Obsessed

RL version 2.0

table

Hello dear reader,

It is sunday morning, and being a traditional type of chap I’m doing that rather splendid sunday morning ritual that I like, this has evolved over time to include the following:

1) Stagger round the bedroom only half aware I’m actually awake.

2) Walk downstairs carefully avoiding opening both eyes at once in case this prompts sensory overload.

3) Walk through the dining room (and this is the new bit) and stub my toe on the table I was supposed to put together yesterday.

Now you may think (quite rightly) that you have no interest whatever in my morning ritual, the fact that I walk the dog only after having one large cup of coffee and two cigarettes simply flies over your head as though it was completely uninteresting, try as I might I cannot “sex” it up to the point where it becomes interesting to even myself.

You may feel this is going nowhere and I must have started drinking in the mornings, I haven’t by the way that would be weird, sherry only after 6pm is what it tells me in the good guide to being an Englishman.

The point, however silly it seems, is my table, this isn’t a new table, it’s one I have been gifted, very nice it is too, all wooden and table-like with a flash of metal, even has chairs, but I digress. The thing that struck me this morn was that I kinda wished it was a SL table, if that were the case I would have had to put of getting the tool box out and actually assembling the damned thing, no I could just have “rezzed” it wherever I liked with no more effort than just pointing. As it is on the floor of my dining room is a rather forlorn looking collection of wood and metal, that I trust to be a table and chairs once put together. This doesnt happen in SL, if you want something you can just go buy it and rez, then if you decide that you no longer like it just pick it up. If I decide I don’t like this table I’m kinda stuck with it.

The way I see it we have two choices to correct this imbalance in both worlds.

1) Ban all flying and tp’ing in SL, make ppl walk I say, think of the potential money generated by SL taxi drivers and/or bus companies, now I don’t ride the bus in RL so am unlikely to do so in a virtual world, I look forward to the first limo company being created in SL tho 😀 This would also allow me to make some use of the collection of cars I have in my inventory, other than parking them outside the Winchester of course.

2) Improve RL to include the ability to simply teleport to anywhere you wish, provided you haven’t been banned for being partnered to the owner,  turning into a rather weird 14-year-old stalker man/boy. (This happens often I believe) The ability to fly and store my belongings in a hard drive connected to my brain would also be a welcome relief, if like me, you consider the act of going up into the loft as some kind of mental torture designed to persuade that you would in fact rather be doing anything else, including even that bastard offspring of mundane tasks “going shopping for wallpaper on a sunday afternoon when you would rather be laid on the sofa watching tv and eating chocolate”

So, in summary option two may require more work, and the involvement of people with big brains that would be expensive to be made to get out of bed. So clearly option one it is. I look forward to beeping the horn on my vintage Jaguar, roof down possibly wearing a Trilby.  To enable this to all work we would need some form of government, I would like to put myself forward for a position of immense power. TY.

As fascinating as this would all be it does mean that SL would mirror RL more greatly, and I’ve seen enough reality shows in my time to know this would be a bad idea, imagine if SL had people desperate to be a celebrity, hell it would probably even throw up various annoyances including gossip blogs that spills nothing but annoying “non-news”. God knows SL doesnt need THAT. but more importantly it doesn’t mean my table would be put together without me expanding any effort….I’m off to fetch the tool box, I think I prefer things the way they are after all.

Flossy

The New Header.

…we were impressed with this…

you can talk to the BIRDS godammit

..all of our SL’s will be as cool looking as this. I WANT SHADOWS NOW!

Flop house

Room’s available to rent @ 50L a week.

Facilities?

Next door to a bar that has toilets.

How much?

50L a week

How many prims?

100

What happens if I don’t pay my rent?

I kick you out whilst swinging a prim baseball bat.

When can i move in?

whenever you like

When can….

ENOUGH QUESTIONS!!

Contact ssmariner Flossberg in world to apply. kthnkbai.